When we lose someone we love, the grief can feel insurmountable, entering our lives sweeping through all we think we know. It can shatter our world. We feel their loss like a giant hole in our existence. So how can we keep them in our lives and how can we hope that they will be in our future, especially when we feel so fragmented? 

Loss initiates the process of grieving, an innate system that carries us through the pain of losing a loved one. A deeply personal and private experience. Some may seek professional help others try to muddle their way through it. Regardless, innate wisdom often transpires to carry us through the grief, an experience we may not want to be laid bare. So how can we share?

Grief commonly begins as an internal and dominating process with the associated feelings of loss. Grief being innate, it has the seeds of possibility imprinted within it. In time we notice that our loved one can continue to be a part of our inner and outer lives. Via a fond memory, photos, honouring them etc. The very things that initially felt too painful begin to become a comfort. In the shattering of our views and the loss we feel, a deeper connection to our loved one begins to grow. As we start to internalise and experientially share them, they become connected to our everyday life with greater depth. We approach living as if a sense of them is here, inside of us, in our hearts and minds contributing to the world. This builds on the blueprint they already impressed upon us, others and society in their lifetime. Therefore, we add to and elevate their continued presence.

There are various practices and customs in doing this. Yet at its very core, we become part of the vehicle that allows our loved one to continue to have a positive impact in this world and they continue to be here with us as well as transcend unifying us.

Whilst we are still pained by their loss and would choose for them to still be here, this can become a source of comfort from their physical absence. Subsequently nourishing us as well as our loved one. 

We sit in the deep love we have of them, sharing it in our lives, impacting ourselves, others and the world around us whilst loving them forever more.